MASIVE TRIGGER WARNINGS FOR DEATH AND SH/SS
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I’m walking into the graveyard, flowers in hand
i kneel down, wipe off the fresh dirt from her grave, and set them down
as i stand up and wipe off my pants, I see a sign
scrappy and makeshift, much like the yard itself.
it reads “please dont litter”
i laugh, but its not happy
clearly some custodian got tired of the neighborhood kids, despite the fact we dont have any
i sigh
does it count as littering if I leave my soul here?
does it count if I dont ever leave?
i may not leave trash sure, but standing here in my funeral black, i may as well be leaving myself behind.
Do i even want to leave?
in my heart i know what the answer is. i wont even just be leaving my soul. i’ll be leaving myself.
she was all i had left, really. and now without her…
the road the graveyard sits on is narrow, rarely ever traffic
without her, blaring her music with the windows down, now its more empty than ever
on this day, for once, it was busy.
still without her, it was empty.
i wondered if the custodian would count this as littering. i hoped he’d forgive me. i hoped he’d take care of me as he does her.
i stepped out onto the road
and without her, there was no one to hold me back.
(inspired by an actual Please Dont Litter sign
